Who Adopted Whom?

     I have another metaphor that recently came to mind while reading a book called, If GOD Already Knows, Why Pray? by Douglas F. Kelly.  I highly recommend this wonderful book.  It is the second time I'm reading it, and it is basically and expanded dissection of the LORD's Prayer, line by line.  Its very first point is how GOD is our intimate Father, because He is the Intimate Father of Yeshua/Jesus His true and only begotten Son.  We on the other hand are not "related" in such a way to the Father.  We are strangers, orphans on a very large planet called Earth.  This is going to be what seems to be a very basic and primary metaphor and very simple to understand.  Yet the truth of it when truly contemplated is really very deep.  

     Imagine the world as one great big huge orphanage.  GOD is the prospective adoptive parent. He goes to the orphanage, because He desires to adopt some orphaned children.  He did not have to, because He already had a son, but He wanted to expand His family.  Having sought out the orphanage, knowing its full history, because He instituted it, He would know what kind of orphans and counselors (clergy/Bible teachers) are there.  He would know what they are teaching the children. He would know what they are learning, and He would know the heart of each child.  He, therefore, could confidently know who was learning, and who was robotically obeying for rewards.  Some children weren't even interested in rewards, rather they just rebelled against the authorities of those running the orphanage, because they did not like the rules of the road.   

     Having known the heart of each "child" in the orphanage, YHVH GOD Himself would choose which child He would adopt.  He would adopt that child by visiting with him and reaching out to that child. He would introduce Himself and  reveal Himself as their adoptive Father, thus showing that child His intimate and loving nature. That child never even knew that there was an Adoptive Father seeking that child, until the Adoptive Father revealed Himself.  Most times the Father caught him completely off guard.   Because He knew the child, He knew that the child would respond to the Father's revelation of Himself, and come to accept and know Him almost immediately.  Not only would the Father choose and adopt that child, but He would set a standard and rules to live by in order for that child to remain in good graces with Him. Some are just adopted into the family and some of His adopted children were chosen for extraordinary tasks.  They get an extra dose of revelation of Who their Adoptive Father is.  

     Knowing that no child would ever be a perfect child, He arranged for His natural son to be a mediator, a go-between for the sinful child who wanted a Loving Heavenly Father and to be a part of His family.  That child would recognize and gratefully respond in kind to the Son's intervention by doing his very best to live up to the Father's standards and rules.  In other words, the Earth is GOD's house, and if we want to remain living under His "roof," being a part of His family, we have to live by His rules.  Most parents and adult children can understand that rule because I doubt hardly a child who hasn't heard that at least once from his loving parents.  They understand the rules, they respect the rules and they respect the parent who set the rules.  Those who don't understand or respect them leave.  

    The question then remains, and will forever remain, that if the child is officially adopted by the Father, does  the adoption become null and void by the child's own will.  If the child chooses to emancipate himself from the Father, breaking the bond, and seeking out legal and permanent separation from the Father, forgoing the Father's rules and standards, and if he stops respecting Him as the authority and parent, does He get to live with the Father for all eternity?  That is a question that has been debated among Bible Scholars for thousands of years, and I do not intend to answer it.  No one knows who truly is a (permanently)  adopted child of the Father, except the Father.  I suppose the Father takes in some strays out of His hospitality and Grace, but knows ahead of time that they won't stay.  That is His loving nature.  

    He is The Most High, The Almighty, the Creator of all of us, whether we acknowledge that truth or not, but He is Father to those whom He adopts into His personal family.  Let's look at some examples of adopted children. Let's start with the very first one, that would be Noah.  Genesis says that the whole world was bent on doing evil, but Noah found grace in GOD's eyes.  It doesn't say that he was righteous and blameless, as many of us have been falsely taught.  It just said GOD had Grace toward Noah and chose to adopt him and his family.  Nowhere in the Bible does it even imply that Noah or his wife, sons, and daughters-in-law were righteous and deserving in any way of being adopted, it just says that Noah found Grace in GOD.  

     After Noah was Abraham, but the truth of the matter is it was Abraham's father, Terah who was first called, but he only went halfway and stopped.  I think that he would probably be qualified as a stray who chose not to be in the Father's family exclusively.  GOD picked him out of the polytheistic orphanage and gave him the privilege of coming into a true and personally intimate relation to the Father, but he chose not to take it to the level he was called to.   Terah chose not to live and go further on with YHVH GOD, but to stay in Haran and continue with all he knew, which was worship, acknowledgement, reverence, and obedience to many gods.  Everyone then believed in many gods.  Even after Abram was called out and sent forth to the land of Canaan, Abram did not understand that there was only one GOD. It was just that YHVH GOD was the One who called him to follow Him. GOD called him out of Haran and promised to made him a father of a vast family of GOD.  Abraham ended up having many sons by the time his life was over, but Isaac was the only one adopted by GOD to be His very own, and carry His name.  When Isaac became a father, before either of the twins was born, before either had any opportunity to do good or evil, GOD had already picked Jacob to be adopted into His family. (Jacob I have loved, Esau I have hated. Romans 9:13)  (“Was not Esau Jacob’s brother?” declares the LORD. “Yet Jacob I have (chosen/adopted)  loved, Malachi 1:2b  (my interpretation).  Does this make sense?  

     All of GOD's heroes in the Bible were called to and received a special personal, intimate and direct  revelation from the Father Himself. None of them were looking for any kind of heroic work of ADONAI, many did not even know He existed.  (Moses, Gideon, King Saul, King David, Jeremiah, Amos, Elijah, Elisha, all of Jesus's disciples, and Saul/Paul, among many more.) It is GOD the Father who looks down upon our lives before we are even conceived, and it is only He who decides whom He will adopt as His own.  As a church people, whether Roman Catholic, Greek Orthodox, Protestant, or Evangelical, all our lives we have heard that we were either born/baptized into GOD's family as infants, or we asked Jesus into our lives and accepted him as our Lord and Savior.  NOTHING could be further from the truth.  We play no part in being chosen by the Father.  We play no part in our salvation.  We are chosen before we are even born, because the Father is not constricted to time and history.  He knows our nature and our hearts before we are even conceived in the womb, and we are the ones whom GOD chooses, based on His prior knowledge of who we will be.  All of the earth's future is laid out before Him, nothing is hidden from His knowledge, nor out of His total Sovereign control. 

     The next time an evangelical tells you that all you have to do is believe in Jesus, ask him into your heart and life, and make him your personal Savior,  know this, many believed in Jesus while He walked the earth, but to most, he was just a great Tzadik, a holy man, a teacher. Yet, to those whom YHVH GOD had already chosen, He was the mediator, the Messiah, the link between a far-off, out-of-reach, Holy GOD to our  intimate relationship with a yet still Holy and Loving Heavenly Father.  

     If you are reading this and know for sure that you are a part of this intimate family, know this, it was YHVH GOD who adopted you, it was not you who adopted Him.  

 The Completed House of Israel: A GENIUS metaphor created by the Master Builder

Matthew 7

24 “So, everyone who hears these words of mine and acts on them will be like a sensible man who built his house on bedrock. 25 The rain fell, the rivers flooded, the winds blew and beat against that house, but it didn’t collapse, because its foundation was on rock.

     The House of the LORD, the LORD's House, the two houses of Israel, My House..., and many more times is the metaphor of a house compared to the work of YHVH GOD.  Today, sitting in a new doctor's office, YHVH GOD showed me His house, metaphorically speaking, and again, His genius never ceases to amaze me.   I constantly question GOD, "Why are you teaching me all these things, and what am I supposed to do with this new exciting information if I don't have a voice?"   He kept showing me that as long as I am here on this planet, that will be true of me.  I could go into another whole blog post on why that is so, but I will spare you the rabbit trail.  What I will do is try to share you in the most foundational, elementary and metaphorically in plain English what I learn without vomiting all this stored up inside me, overwhelming my reader with some really boring stuff.

        I am no longer a Christian and I'm glad of that, just like I was no longer a Roman Catholic when I was twenty-six and born again, the first time.  I know, I can hear the rumblings going on in your heard.  You think I've turned my back on Jesus, and it's impossible to be born-again twice.  That depends on what your definition of born-again is, and what the definition of is is.  Being called out of the Roman church and now the Protestant church some 29 years later is like being born-again twice, because all of a sudden, the scales fell from my eyes, like they did with Paul the Apostle, but twice.  I've been able to see the deception in both churches that YHVH GOD has allowed to perpetuate for more than 2,000 years.  That's a difficult one to explain, because I still don't understand why YHVH GOD lets "His" people go so far from His original intent, when it comes to building our houses on the principles of GOD. I included both the Roman church and the Protestant church in this "house gone wrong," because one came from the other, both with the same lack of supports and protections from the evil one. 

     Most Christians refer to their church building as the house of the LORD, and that cannot be any further from the truth.  Buildings haven't been the "house of the LORD," since the Temple burned in AD 70.  The House of the LORD isn't a building, it is a chosen people, although, I will use a building to explain how it's not what Christians call the "church."   There are five vital components to building a house and any contractor can tell you that.  There is ground preparation, (sometimes plot selection), there is a foundation, and walls to separate each vital room in the house.  The last and most vital part of the house to top everything off, (pun intended), is the roof.  Here is where the GENIUS of GOD comes into play.

    If GOD wanted to build Himself a house of a special people, I will have to explain each step He crafted into His house, and what the steps represent, (pun intended) in the Whole Counsel of GOD. There are four major Covenants YHVH GOD made with His people, and sadly, many Christians wrongly toss out the first three,, and just keep the top one in their purview.  They live in a roofed house with no walls or foundation and the ground below them is slowing caving in on them like a sink hole.  Soon, there will be nothing left in the NT church/people house, and YHVH GOD will have rescued and called out His beloved from that collapsing invisible house with only a roof and the wrong kind at that.  

    Let's start with the first covenant.  A covenant is either an unconditional promise from GOD, or it's a conditional one.  Either way it is never broken by GOD, nor are they ever obsolete to Him. The first promise GOD made is called the Noahide Covenant, and GOD gave this to Noah through no merit of his own doing.  The Bible says that GOD found Grace for Noah, and out of that Grace, He saved only eight people out of millions if not billions to start all over again.  He flooded the earth to prepare the ground for a better house.  Do you see the ground preparation there?  His sign to Noah to honor His Covenant was the rainbow.  This was a sign only YHVH could do, and man could play no part in this outward appearance of a eternal covenant YHVH made with Noah and his descendants, that would be us.  

     After the ground is properly prepared, there is the foundation that needs to be built. He is building a "single" structure, calling out a single people, one nation He will covenant with, and everyone outside of that house is not part of the Kingdom of GOD.  They can enter the house and join in the Covenant, but again, by invitation only.  The Abraham Covenant is the foundation of the house on a set and prepared ground, which is the land of Canaan. The sign for this covenant was circumcision.  It was a physical reminder for man to know that he was chosen out of the general population to become a people of GOD all unto themselves.  

    The next thing YHVH  GOD needed to put up was the framework to support the walls which partition off specific rooms, different from each other with a different purpose, but all part of His house, and vital to this house, if it is to stand. The Mosaic Covenant is the framework and the walls, all 613 Laws.  Each beam/law is vital and weightbearing.  The sign for that Covenant was the Sabbath day for His people. This would be a house that all the residents would rest on the Sabbath day, and no one would leave it, or do chores in it.  This would separate the residents in GOD's House from those outside. This required obedience on the residents part, so it was a conditional covenant. Man had to play a part in it for it to be valid.  

     I think that is pretty obvious which covenant and vital piece to the home is.  The Christian church calls it the New Covenant, but actually each covenant was new when it was introduced to GOD's people and built into the framework of His House of Israel, His united house of ten tribes or clans if you will.  The Roof is Yeshua HaMashiach, or Jesus the Christ as the Roman and Protestant church know him.   He is the covering over the entire structure keeping it safe and under his name and his name only.  The sign for this new addition to the house of Israel is the Holy Spirit.  It is GOD dwelling in the house with us, like the Noahide Covenant, we cannot do this ourselves.  It's not a matter of physical changes, obedience to something. It is a spiritual invite into the house, and we receive it as soon as we cross the threshold.   Of course, the door has to open and the owner of the house must invite us into the His house, we surely can't burst in and breakdown the door.  Only YHVH GOD has the key to unlock the door for us, and that is Grace. He has to give us the key to get in, because the door is locked from the inside with Grace in with Yeshua holding the key.  The house has a back door for residents to leave who want to move out and go it alone out in the big bad mean world. 

       Let's look into the house and the walls and partitions the gentiles removed, erasing the purpose of each room, and creating their own work space. (Pun intended).    The Living Room, that is where the guests come to visit, and the residents are to be hospitable and love the guests when they enter, some even become permanent members inside YHVH's house. The next room is the kitchen, the food rules which help us decide which foods are good for the body, and kosher for cleanliness.  The family room is where we all gather as a united family to worship YHVH, and praise Him for building a house and inviting us into it.  The bedrooms represent the sexual activity, or rather procreation.  There are certain sex laws in the Mosaic Law, hence, strangers from outside the house are not welcome inside the bedrooms of the dwellers of YHVH's house.  Last but not least, is the bathroom, where are sins are washed away, either in the shower with Living Water, or flushed down the commode by animal sacrifice.  Now, that Yeshua has put a roof over our heads, we still have Living Water, however the waste isn't necessary to get rid of in the commode, because it is permanently removed from the residents in the home.  It is impossible to keep all 613 Mosaic laws, because there is no Temple, and we can't just go off and stone our rebellious children, however, those of the beams in the framework, and are covered by the Roof. 

     So, there you have it, the House of Israel, with it's ground prepared by the Hand of GOD, (Noahide Covenant), it's rock foundation on a plot of land, Canaan, built to hold up the walls and the house and be the main support for the House of Israel, (Abraham Covenant), and the framework and walls, separating each room for a specific purpose. (Mosaic Laws).  The Roof is the New Covenant of Yeshua covering over all the residents, keeping powers and principalities of the air away, above, and outside of the people safely tucked inside. One Covenant is built upon the previous covenant, which prepared the house for the new addition.  None of the covenants can be negated or removed, lest the house will fall.  

    

     So, where did it all go wrong?  It was as early as the 2nd century.  First the house was strong and healthy, but as some new people came in, (gentiles) they began to take over. They didn't like the original Architectural plans, so the very first thing they did was to remove the foundation. Next they knocked down the walls, to make it one big open space with no definition, no organized purpose. The walls and beams collapsed, letting the outside world free access to the inside of the house, without an invitation.  Last of course, was to  relocate the house to a new plot, in a new neighborhood, in a new land. The house went from the land of Canaan to Rome.  That land was not properly prepared, and it was also given a new name.  It was no longer the House of Israel, but it was the house of Roman Catholicism.  They even elected their own "builder" to redesign and renovate the house, in the papacy, as if there was something wrong with the original plans.  They had a foreign mother in a false goddess, renamed to Mary, the mother of their gentile Jesus, a roof with holes in it.  A house with no foundation, no framework, no walls, but just a roof cannot stand, and it is not the house YHVH built.  

    I'm sorry if this went a little long, but hopefully you were fascinated enough to keep reading, and now you have a better understand why the Old Covenant/Testament has been improperly labeled and discarded as if not needed. You cannot have a Roof without all those Covenants remaining in place.   I take no credit for this metaphor, because as I state before, YHVH GOD gave me this picture and labeled each part of His House of Israel, assigning a Covenant to each part.  

 Bi-polar Faith

   When it comes to tools, I'm not the  sharpest nail in the tool box, in fact, most of the time, I am definitely rusted and bent, and not good for anything when it comes to fixing or assembling anything. I used to have no clue how to use most tools, especially power tools, nor did I ever care to learn.  Anything I knew I couldn't fix or assemble, I labeled as men's work.  For over three decades, I was married to Mr. Fix-it. Whenever he ran into a problem, all I had to to was praise him, assure him that I believed he would come up with a solution, and he always did.  I never had to to worry about trying to fix things or "some assembly required," even during the first six years of our separation. 

    For the first six years of our separation, as soon as something broke, or needed assembling, he was over in a jiffy to do it for us. Unfortunately, there was one thing he did not want to fix, and that was his family, his marriage, and his broken faith in GOD.  I am not sure when his faith in GOD got broken, maybe it was never functional in the first place. When he bought his civil divorce for our covenant marriage, the judge gave him what he wanted, freedom, and me what I wanted, EVERYTHING! I got the house and everything in it, including decades worth of tools and gadgets that he hoarded over the years.  

    I knew that I had to learn how to start doing those things that I had always labeled as men's work.  I had to learn how to use those tools, yes, even the power tools, which I had avoided like the plague, until yesterday, when I managed to install tip-out trays under my sink. I was absolutely convinced that I could do it, even though using a power drill was so foreign and frightening to me all these years.  I knew if I kept at it and did not give up, I would get this job done, even if the tip-out trays did not fit my forty-year old kitchen cabinets.  I knew I could make adjustments if I needed to which again, was nothing I had ever attempted before that. 

  It took me over twelve hours working on what the instruction manual said was a thirty-minute job. Normally, I would never have even attempted such a masculine task, but I had this confidence that seem to come to me, Supernaturally.  Today, while driving, when I was talking to Him, asking Him why my faith was so strong one day, and so incredibly weak and useless another day, the LORD gave me a vision of the two types of screws I had encountered during that "ordeal."  

    For instance, my faith is like that big huge screw with  finely chiseled rivets, but on most days, my faith in the Jubilee Dream He gave me ten years ago this month, is usually more like that tiny worn-out rusty screw with the stripped head, making it near impossible to remove or use.  Like most women, my faith is rooted in what kind of mood I am in on any particular day.  I float back and forth between believing the impossible in what seems more like a delusional Biblical faith like David's, or very depressed days like Elijah, drowning in disbelief.   On those days, I am  convinced that I'll never be able to be used in GOD's Kingdom, because I am convinced that I will be  muddled forever in mourning, grieving a past that wasn't all that great to begin with, but much better than my present reality, I continually lose hope for  experiencing a victorious future. I want to be able to testify to GOD's faithfulness in miraculously getting us out of problems that most humans cannot find their way out of on their own, whether they jumped into that pit of despair and disillusionment or were pushed.  

     I want to give that one person on the verge of giving up the reason that they cling to hope and faith, in not only if GOD can, but that He will. My Jubilee Dream died a few years ago, but Jehovah Rapha resurrected last week.  He brought it back to life with new easy-to-believe details that make so much more sense, based on the past ten years of all He has taught me.  One part of the dream is easy to believe, it's the "too-good-to-be-true" part that I struggle with, because my life's experiences testify otherwise.  That's the part I want to be able to give GOD all the glory of, and relish in the joy it would bring to my life. 

 

     

Some people just don't like some people.

     My former husband, said to me for three decades, "That's why people don't like you, Kristina." I heard it so much that I began to dislike myself to the point of self-hatred.  It took GOD several years to convince me that it wasn't me, it was the speaker who was in the wrong.  I also heard it  so often from my mother, who never liked me, my siblings, who never liked me, besides my husband of three decades, who never liked me, and I felt it from the other man I thought I wanted to marry. So, I asked GOD, "Why don't people like me?" Here is the answer I think I got from the Holy Spirit: 

     "Some people don't like passionate people. Some people don't like those who go all in when they believe in something.  Some people don't like some people who love as deeply as you do, because that kind of devoted love they think they can never match.  Take heart, dear child, here is another  list of some people that some people don't like."

     Abraham, who had the courage to confront GOD about wiping out Sodom and Gomorrah, knowing his nephew and his family lived there.

     Sarah, who wanted Abraham to get rid of the slave woman and her illegitimate son when he taunted her son, who was the son of promise.

     Rebekah, who was barren, when  she confronted her husband to demand that he demand YHWH to give her a child, Who in turn gave her two. One would be the father of many, in fact a whole tribe of them. 

    

     Jacob, who confronted Laban for the way he swindled him out of twenty years of hard labor. He also wrestled with GOD, and refused to give in, until the ANGEL OF THE LORD gave in and let him be on his way, after maiming him. 

     Moses, now there was a confrontational man. First he killed an Egyptian for beating up a Hebrew, then he had the gall to return to Egypt forty years later to demand that Pharaoh release his "free" labor force and set GOD's people free from their slavery.

     Caleb demanded the best of the best of the land in the promise land, because Moses promised it to him. Then, at eighty-five-years-old, attacked and conquered the people of that land.

     Gideon, least of the least, who was also what the angel of the LORD called a valiant warrior, who while hiding from the Midianites in a wine press, later had the courage and nerve to take down the altar of Baal as well as the Midianite's Asherah pole. He then took on an army of just 300 men to the camp of 132,000 Midianites with some lamps and pitchers to destroy that nation and force there out of the land of the Israelites, given to them by Elohim.

     Samson..., okay, let's skip that one!

     Ruth, who boldly refused to return to the land of Moab, choosing instead to remain with the mother of her dead husband to travel to a foreign land, where she knew she would be considered and "abominable" foreigner.

     Samuel, who confronted King Saul who could have had him killed by denouncing him as an illegitimate king, and that the Most High would dethrone him and give the throne to a man after GOD's own heart, which would have to be a passionate heart, as He is a passionate and jealous GOD.

     David who was a fugitive for eight plus years, because he was favored of GOD, and hated by the human King Solomon. 

 

 

     Solomon, when given a choice between riches and GOD's wisdom to rule a nation, Solomon chose wisdom, which in turn got him into much trouble, because that kind of wisdom brings on much sorrow, and a human is just not capable of carrying that which YHVH GOD carries.

     Hezekiah, who saw how far GOD's people had fallen, and he instituted reforms, taking down all the high places the people had built to sacrifice to foreign gods, which were not gods at all.

     Josiah, a young king, who when the Law was found hidden in the Temple, tore his clothes, covered himself in ashes, and insisted that the people repent of worshiping other gods, and he then re-instituted the Passover and other Levitical feast.

     Of course, there's Jeremiah, Isaiah, Amos, Micah, Zephaniah,  Obadiah, Joel, Nahum, Habakkuk, Ezekiel, Hosea, who married a prostitute, then bought her back after she strayed.  Daniel and his three friends, Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, who defied two kings' royal decrees.  After the exile, there was Zechariah, Malachi, Haggai.  Jonah and Job are my favorites, because both rebelled against GOD in word, and for Jonah, in deed.   

 

     Mordecai who refused to leave the kings gate, ratted out some treasonous plotters bent on killing King Ahasuerus, a Babylonian king, nonetheless, then put his cousin, the queen in her place when she refused to go to the king to save her people. Then had the gall to put the Queen in her place and remind her of her humble beginnings. 

     Judas Maccabees, who infuriated by Antiochus IV of Epiphanes slaughtering an unclean animal in the Sacred Temple of the LORD, on the Altar, nonetheless, led a rebellion that is remembered every Hanukkah to commemorate the deliverance of GOD's people from the type and shadow of who will be the next anti-Christ.

     Shall I mention Jesus, who confronted the Pharisees for three and a half years over their hypocrisy and abandonment of the true letter of the Law, and was crucified because of that, or does that not need to be mentioned, because it's quite obvious? I did just mention it, didn't I? That crucifixion ended the devil's reign on  all those who look to Yeshua HaMashiach as their Savior from death and hades.

     Peter, a man who could not stop putting his foot in his mouth, who had the nerve to rebuke the Son of GOD who prophesied about his impending death. Then, he claimed he would defend Jesus to the death, if need be, when he told them that he would be handed over to the "authorities" to be flogged and killed. Yeah, that promise didn't go as planned.

     And last, but definitely not least, the obnoxious, Jesus-hating, Apostle Paul, who was hell-bent on killing all the followers of The Way, until Jesus stopped him cold dead in his tracks and blinded him to the lie, while opening his eyes to the truth.

     Well, after all those examples, I can see why people don't like me.  Some people just can't handle those who go all in.  Mediocre is all they want.  My former husband always said his favorite verse was about just living a quiet peaceful life, avoiding all conflicts.  (That is his whole understanding of the Whole Counsel of GOD)  

    I have heard it said that if one is really walking closely with GOD, then people will either hate you or love you.  The ones who hate you are the ones who wish they were walking the same way you were, and were as close to YHVH GOD themselves, or those who have not been chosen and remain on the road to destruction.  Yet, the ones who love you are walking that closely and can spot a fellow chosen servant with a specific duty to reach people.  Contrary to popular opinion, if people just like you, then likely you are doing it wrong!  Jesus called "liked" people, vomit.  Revelation 3:16. 

Take heart dear confrontational sister or brother, GOD made you that way, because He has a great plan for you!   

The Stepping Stones to Success Require Being Forcibly Stuffed with Humble Pie. 

     I hate that I am "growing old" alone, but it is GOD's will for me at this point in my life.  After seeing this picture of myself pop up on my app that brings the past back to light by way of my photos, I now see that these were apparently happier days.  Even though I was going through somewhat of a depressive state, I had no idea just how difficult and heartbreaking life could actually become in later years.   I remember this time in my life. I was suffering from infertility. Yes, this octomom suffered from infertility for eighteen months after child number five. Everyone told me, "Be happy with the five you have." It wasn't as if I wasn't happy, it was that I knew in my heart GOD had another one coming, and I could not get regnant. 

     I had no problem getting pregnant with the first five. I could not understand what was going wrong. I had  my first known miscarriage of the four total when I was forty years old, six months after this picture was taken.  It was difficult enough getting pregnant. So when I lost it, I went into a deep depression. A friend of mine suggested a book called The Thyroid Solution. It turned out that I had hypothyroidism, and had it for several years.  I recommend this book to everyone. 

     Never ever accept, "The lab test was fine." You need to take a proactive interest in your own body, and always investigate and research until your eyes bleed. Hypothyroidism is an undiagnosed epidemic affecting men and women,  because doctors treat lab results, not symptoms. My friend gave me the name of a doctor who treated the patient, not the lab results. He started me on thyroid medication and three weeks later, I was pregnant with number six.

     My OB had told me when I was having trouble getting pregnant, to be happy with the five GOD gave me and accept that my baby making days were over. I could not accept anyone's advice, because I knew in my heart there was another one coming.  I was forty-one when number six was born, forty-three when number seven was born and one month shy of forty-six when number eight was born.  I guess my experienced OB was wrong, because he was operating out of a textbook, while I was operating from my faith in GOD and what the Bible says.  

     Before each baby was conceived, I knew that another one was coming.  GOD has put that child and the burning desire to have another in my heart.  I can prove that because after number eight, we named Max, because we reached our Max for the first time in twenty-one years. For years, Psalm 37:4 has been my life's verse.  Now, I understand why.  

    When we delight ourselves in the LORD, the desires of your heart He gave us.  (The proper translation from the original Hebrew) The Hebrew word NATAN, means set, put, hence the reason why we desire a said thing is because GOD wants us to desire it and pray our hearts out to get it. 

     Never ever accept what anyone else tells you if GOD has told you differently. Everyone tells me that my "dream/vision" is my own, that it was my own desire, and that I made up all the signs GOD has given me in my imagination.   GOD has again proven that it is His will for my life. This time, it hasn't been only 18 months, but almost ten years. 

    When I first began this work of writing for the LORD, back then, you could not have convinced me that I would go ten years without seeing any fruit from my labor for the LORD.  I'm glad He has hidden any fruit from me, because the flawed human I am, I know that I would have and still would have let success go to my head. I'm thankful that very rarely do I get a letter from a reader telling me just how much my writing has helped them. The last thing I need is praise from humans.

     It is a rare thing for any person to be able to properly handle long range and huge success in their field or craft.  That kind of "praise and worship" from the public will feed the beastly ego in all of us whether that person is a believer in Jesus or not.  Just because one believes and follows His ways, does not mean that they are not easily tripped up by the minions the devil sends in his strategy to defeat us. We are all human, and we all fail and fall.  I'm so glad that all my failures and falls were done while I was still a nobody.  Back when I first started writing, I wanted a great deal of fruit and success, however, seeing how many times I have failed at my job, I am so happy that I have more failures under my belt than successes.

Looking for GOD in all the Wrong Places!

     These are the OT prophecies the western church ignores, because they are so caught up in the rapture lie. Can anyone really believe that millions of martyrs suffered unspeakable atrocities and died for the faith, and yet the Laodicean church thinks GOD will spare them the suffering that is coming, called Jacob's Trouble?  What did Yeshua call the Laodicean church?  He equated it with vomit.  That is the western Christian church today, the wealthy incorporated church. 

 

Malachi 2:7

     “For the lips of a priest should keep knowledge, And people should seek the law from his mouth; For he is the messenger of the Lord of hosts. 8 But you have departed from the way; You have caused many to stumble at the law. You have corrupted the covenant of Levi,” Says the Lord of hosts. 9 “Therefore I also have made you contemptible and base Before all the people, Because you have not kept My ways  But have shown partiality in the law.”  

 
     11 For Judah has profaned The Lord’s holy institution which He loves: He has married the daughter of a foreign god. 12 May the Lord cut off from the tents of Jacob The man who does this, being awake and aware,  Yet who brings an offering to the Lord of hosts! 13 And this is the second thing you do: You cover the altar of the Lord with tears, With weeping and crying; So He does not regard the offering anymore, Nor receive it with goodwill from your hands.

 

   YHWH  is not revealing His truth to the western (contemporary) church anymore.  The western contemporary church has chosen the idol of free will and grace not Law.  The narrative the church teaches is that the Law is obsolete and we are under Grace to live as we believe best.  The average contemporary western Christian is so obsessed with the Rapture doctrine, that they have forsaken the true teaching of Yeshua who taught what Moses taught.  I would venture to bet that there are very few who even understand the origins of this false doctrine of the Rapture.  Most western Christians don't care to research for themselves, because if their pastor said it, then it must be true.  After all, he got a seminary degree, so he must be correct in his theology, right?  Has it ever occurred to the average Christian that the seminaries could be wrong?  

    The rapture lie began in 1830 with a lawyer who was brand new to the faith. He was a corrupt lawyer who became a recent convert and in his arrogance, he wrote his own version of the Bible called the Scofield Study Bible. Look it up. The church got it's doctrine of the rapture from the commentary notes of a corrupted new convert, who didn't know the Whole Counsel of the Law.  The devil knew that the church would cling on to this because it appeals to the flesh of avoiding suffering.

    How do I know this to be true beyond a shadow of a doubt? Because I've "Lived Like Jeremiah in Job's World."  

Jeremiah 1: “Therefore prepare yourself and arise, And speak to them all that I command you. Do not be dismayed before their faces, Lest I dismay you before them. 18 For behold, I have made you this day A fortified city and an iron pillar, And bronze walls against the whole land— Against the kings of Judah, Against its princes, Against its priests, And against the people of the land. 19 They will fight against you, But they shall not prevail against you. For I am with you,” says the Lord, “to deliver you.”
 

    How do I know this to the message to the Gentile Christian church today? It is because for 55 years, I thought I was the granddaughter of an Italian Immigrant Roman Catholic. As it turned out, I found out in 2018 that I was  the granddaughter of a JEWISH Italian Immigrant from the tribe of Judah.   It all started to make perfect sense why GOD pulled me out of the corrupt system called the incorporated church.  It has become the whore of Babylon.  

  There is a great awakening happening in the world today by the Spirit of GOD.  This great awakening is taking His True Remnant back to the Torah, not for salvation but for working out our salvation in fear and trembling.  I never thought I would say this, but there is actually more freedom in the 613 Mosaic Laws than in the thousands of new church rules established by men over the years. 

     One church teaches one that a woman can't teach or wear slacks, another teaches that Paul's Epistles are GOD new commandments.  One teaches that drinking any alcohol is a sin, yet no where can that be found in the Torah.  Far be it from me to disqualify Paul as an Apostle assigned by GOD to the Gentiles, because he was.  The only One who can create a Commandment is GOD Himself through the Torah and Yeshua who only repeated His Father's commandments.  

Leviticus 19:18You shall not take vengeance, nor bear any grudge against the children of your people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself: I am the Lord.

     The problem with the western church  is with the gentiles reading Paul's letter incorrectly. A great teacher named David Pawson said it like this: "Imagine you are in a public place and someone next to you is on their cell phone and all you can hear is one end of the conversation.  You can only assume what the other person is saying, and yet you could be completely off base chasing rabbit trails.  Paul's letter were like that.  They were answers to questions and issues facing those particular churches.  Not all those issues and questions apply to every believer.  I can assure you that Paul never intended his letter to become equal with the Scripture from which he quoted. 

“They shall be Mine,” says the Lord of hosts, “On the day that I make them My jewels.  And I will spare them

As a man spares his own son who serves him.”   Then you shall again discern

Between the righteous and the wicked,

Between one who serves God

And one who does not serve Him.

Malachi 3:17-18

Psalm 32:8

I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will guide you with My eye.

     November 2008 when my eldest child got engaged to the devil incarnate who we thought was Prince Charming, I had no idea that the next nine months would be the worst nine months of my life.  In August 2009, I heard in my spirit, GOD directly telling me that my daughter would not be back in my house or life for seven years. Of course I doubted I heard correctly; I absolutely refused to believe that the worst case scenario would happen. I thought, there was no way I could survive seven years being completely cut off from my first born.

     For the next seven years, I continued to doubt what I heard was correct. Each passing month proved it to be true, however. Graduations, stroke, dual cancers, none of those brought her home. The closer I got to the seven year mark, the more that feeling in my gut convicted me that what I heard was right.  When I found out she was divorcing the devil incarnate seven years to the month from when she got engaged to him, then I really started to believe that my gut feeling was the Holy Spirit saying, "What did I tell you?"

      August of 2016 I had all eight of my children sitting down at a wonderful family dinner for the first time since Thanksgiving 2008. When I started to get all weepy, like I always do, I went out to my deck swing where I have the best talks with GOD, and where He told me that she would not be home for seven years, it hit me like  ton of bricks. It was SEVEN years to the month exactly from when I perceived He told me and when it truly happened.

     I have had other instances, like my husband's cancer and my own that GOD gave me a heads up on years before it happened. His cancer took 18 years to manifest as the exact same cancer He told me it would be. Mine took 2 but I had no idea what kind it would be. When it turned out to be an extremely rare one, even MORE rare in women, and even more rare in women my age, then I knew I had heard from GOD two years prior.

    I've learned to really rely on that gut instinct, that voice in the back of my head, which I now know to be the Holy Spirit. What GOD puts in my head that He intends to do, He in fact does it, regardless of how many years past before He does it.