Take it to the proper place, Facebook!

 

 Everyone says never to air our dirty laundry publicly on Facebook or social media, but I think GOD disagrees.  Usually what man thinks, GOD is thinking the exact opposite, but with a twist of Omniscient Wisdom mixed into it.  Some of us need to process our thoughts and pains and we think out loud. I used to be a journaler until arthritis made holding a pen so very unpleasant.  Age does that, it makes our thoughts clearer and our penmanship more difficult to decipher to even ourselves.  Do we have examples of journalers in the Bible?  I dare say yes, at least 150 times if not more. The book of Psalms is the writer publicizing his agonizing and invigorating thoughts for the readers to digest into their own lives. The Psalmist is processing his pain and the confusion into eloquent words until by the end of the Psalm, for the most part, he has acquired valuable wisdom from Above. In fact, a few of his enemies who did him wrong are in the book of Psalms.  Paul and John had no problem naming those in their letters who were attempting to do them much damage. 

 3 John 9-12  I wrote to the church, but Diotrephes, who loves to have the preeminence among them, does not receive us.  Therefore, if I come, I will call to mind his deeds which he does, prating against us with malicious words. And not content with that, he himself does not receive the brethren, and forbids those who wish to, putting them out of the church.  Beloved, do not imitate what is evil, but what is good. He who does good is of God, but he who does evil has not seen God.   Demetrius has a good testimony from all, and from the truth itself. And we also bear witness, and you know that our testimony is true.

Two other books in the Bible are the writers penning their frustrations with GOD and with life in general.   The book of Ecclesiastes is the work of the wealthiest and wisest king of Israel, in which he is griping about how meaningless life is.  All the way through it, Solomon is trying to process the intense Wisdom from Above, because he was given more than a flawed human would be able to bear and carry.  Let me tell you, it's true, the more you know, the more you wish you didn't know. By the time he gets to the twelfth chapter, he is able to put all his complaining and moaning together and come out with timeless wisdom that for 3,000 years we have benefited.  Job is another who did a whole lot of complaining to GOD, blaming Him for his dire straits, although, usually we are not taught that.  The Most High gave the devil free reign up to a certain point to wreak havoc in Job's life.  Most of the Job’s words were his complaining to GOD and why I wrote the book, The Wrath of Job, In His Own Words.  It’s not a commentary, it’s just Job complaining to GOD, airing his frustrations.  We get so lost up in the selfish and evil motives of his “friends” trying to pin blame on Job, that we miss the entirety of Job airing his frustration with GOD. I spent a whole weekend once just writing Job’s and only Job’s words down in a notebook, and boy did I get an eyeful, one I never got in any Bible study specifically on that book in any church setting.  

So, like David, Solomon, and Job, my goal in life in life is to bear fruit, fruit for those who have already experienced the pain of betrayal, the loss of hope, and endless days of drowning in their seas of despair.  I tell people, I want to be a lighthouse for those who can no longer swim in their seas of despair.  One of the place where I can best process my thoughts is on Facebook, believe it or not.  I don't have any "friends" on Facebook, so, I assume GOD will send it where it needs to go.  Most times, it's a rough draft for a new blog post. In fact, that’s how this blog post came to be. 

I want to bear fruit when I'm up in heaven, not while I'm down here. I know myself pretty well, and GOD knows me better.  I would not do very well with success. Failure, on the other hand, I excel at, and I am able to take it all in stride as I am quite used to it.  Failure is  safe, especially in obscurity.  It's in the failure that we learn the most about us, other people, life, and our Savior and GOD.  People give me a hard time about all the stuff I put up on my Facebook page, but what they don't realize is that those are the little 2 am sessions are lessons of wisdom I get usually when insomnia from menopause takes control of my sleep schedule. I always ask GOD the big questions during those, what I call, toddler temper tantrums, because to Him, I am that.  We are all just newborns and toddlers to our Omniscient and Wise GOD. Who would understand us better than our own creator, just like we understand and are patient with our own toddlers during their little fits, because their brains are not ready to reason.

 

 

 King Saul reigned over David for thirty years and wanted him dead for nearly half those years.

I've been living here in the heart of the Bible Belt coming up on 30 years and under the "reign of a King Saul" for all those years, but he wasn't always wicked. A lot of that time he was fair to decent, but then he started going "mad" about 14 yrs ago. Each year, he's gotten progressively worse, bad enough to make me block out the good years. When I do remember the good years, I go into a tailspin of grief, because that man is dead, never to return. Right now, I'm under his "reign," and there's not a thing I can do about it. This is GOD's ordained will for my life. I just have to grin and bear it. Like Jonathan, I know GOD's hand is off this Saul and on another, but that other isn't ready to "take the throne." Like Abigail, I see the anointing on a "David" whose weakness is his flesh, but I also see his destiny is to be "king."

I'm having the hardest fight of my life keeping the faith of a Jonathan and an Abigail. I cannot escape "King Saul" because GOD wants me under his rule for now. I get so frustrated with GOD because I know "Saul's" destiny and ending, and it isn't going to be good, but I don't know when his "reign" will end. I keep getting too caught up in the debauchery, rebellion, and vindictive madness of this "King Saul," who is hunting me down, trying to destroy me from the inside out. I get lost in the pain of it, both for its evil foundations (the devil himself), and the grief over the man who used to be and will never be again. It tears away at my faith and strength, and each day/year I get weaker and weaker. I have no one to support me, no shoulder to cry on, so I am all alone in the Cave of Adullum. I don't have a Joab or a discontented army of 600 devoted to me, I only have 6 offspring, none of them who are walking with GOD. I have a few scattered friends, but they just don't get it. They cannot see what GOD has shown me.

So, the point of this blog post is if you have been under an oppressive King Saul for 15 days or 15 weeks or 15 months or 15 years, and God gave you a vision, a hope, and a dream, and you know from the bottom of your heart to the depths of your soul it came from God, the wait is hell on earth, but God understands that he gets it. It may only take one hour or so to read David's plight in 1 Samuel, however, every moment, every second of those 15 years of agony for David, GOD was with him on the mountain tops and most importantly in the valleys of despair. He is with me and you, also. I found this today and it describes in great detail the worst fifteen plus years of David's life, and I can so relate to this.

David's Horrendous run from Saul