I WILL NOT PUT A DRESS, A VEIL, AND A BOW-TIE ON DIVORCE BECAUSE SIN IS GROTESQUE  

     My husband and I married 40 years ago this year, vowing never to divorce.  We had a Covenant Marriage ceremony on our fifth anniversary after we had become Born-Again Christians, vowing again to never divorce. During all eight baby dedications we re-vowed to raise all our babies in a Godly home and to never divorce.  We vowed to remain in a loving nurturing husband, wife, relationship as  father and mother to  our children so they could be raised in a s secure environment where they knew they were loved. A human judge tried to get me to gloss over my Covenant husband's decision to buy himself a NO-FAULT divorce, well I say, HELL NO!  I will not put a dress on his actions and just write off everything we vowed, and tried to build so he can destroy it, and walk away free and clear.  I will never lie to my children, ever.  I grew up with all liars, I will not repeat history, even if their father wants history repeated.  I contested the divorce and told the judge that the GOD of the universe would overrule him.  Not only did I not sign the papers, but until six months ago, I never even kept a copy of the divorce papers. I put them where GOD would have put them, in the trash.  I knew if I read them it would cause more division between my husband and I, and that I would hate him all the more.  Sadly, I needed the papers for a legal matter and had to have my Covenant husband make a copy for me.  It was an eye opener when I did read them and found out what was in them.  I'll just leave it at that, but I have grounds to protect myself if I have to. I don't believe I will have to go back to court, because the Lawgiver who wrote the Laws of the Universe will protect me as He always has. The divorce judge tried to tell me that I could not discuss the divorce with my children as if he had a right to strip me of my right to free speech. 

 I refuse to let that judge tell me how to raise my children and strip me of my Constitutional right to free speech.  That judge may have demanded I remain silent, but I answer to YHVH GOD alone.   I will not say, "Well, daddy just decided to love someone else besides the woman to whom he married and vowed ten times to be faithful to, but we must respect his decision."  I refuse to participate in what GOD says He hates.    People advised me to get a lawyer and fight him, and fight for them and get all I can get from their father.  That did not happen. My Lawyer sat right next to me, although, I was the only one who knew He was there.  My husband  divorced me after 35 devoted years over Skype, behind a monitor and with a  lawyer whom I compared to an abortionist, because she murders the one-flesh.  My Lawyer told me that when he divorced me and himself from his vows to YHVH GOD, he divorced himself from the One Whom he vowed to.  He may still attend church, but YHVH GOD is not with him, a sad fact he cannot see himself.  it is much like when YHVH GOD's spirit King Saul and Samson, neither one noticed.   

I tried my hardest to talk him out of this divorce. I pleaded with him, begged him, and told him that the repercussions would be irreparable, especially with his children, and four years has passed, and what I feared has come to pass.  I did not try to destroy his relationship with his children, I kept trying to repair it, however, he never cooperated with that effort.  I watched what happened to my father with his remaining five children happen to my own husband and children's father, and it grieves me so.  It was six years after he told me that he was going to divorce me that he finally did it, after he got a big windfall inheritance.  Since his first big purchase with that inheritance was retaining a divorce lawyer, his money is running out like a leaky faucet.  He can't see that as GOD's doing either.  He used what GOD gave him to do something the devil led him to do.  He admitted to me that GOD was not telling him to divorce me, so he admitted to going against YHVH GOD, the One he doesn't like.  He much prefers the one he created in his own image.  He divorced me to keep me from his money, but GOD has taken it from him anyway.   

  I want my children to hate divorce as much as GOD and I do, but I realized that even though I grew up in the most nastiest of divorces as did my husband, we did not really understand the devastation of it back then, after all, everyone was doing it.  I was a teenager when it happened to me as a child, hence it wasn't until I hit middle age, and as a devoted servant of GOD, that I truly understood the tragedy of it.  I did not appreciate the devastation it caused my own mother back then, and I'm sorry I was not able to be more of a help for her.  Sadly, my children will never truly understand it either, unless it happens to them, which I pray it does not.   

To make matters even worse, he is divorced me on the 36th anniversary of the day he asked me to marry him.  GOD is Sovereign over every detail of our lives, and the irony of the first hearing being on the day my husband asked me to marry him is proof that what he did is an abomination to GOD and to his family.  For as tragic as this has been, I have to give the man the credit he is due.  His father abandoned him, moved out of state and never paid his mother a penny.  My Covenant husband vowed never to do that and promised to fully financially support me and his children so that I could remain home as a full-time mother, and he kept that promise and quite generously until recently.  When he moved in with his girlfriend, everything changed. I guess it goes to show that writing a check to GOD or our spouse for child support  is easier than obeying Him and remaining faithful to our vows.  What did Samuel tell King Saul?  

    I start a new job in three weeks, after not working for over ten years.  I'm nervous and excited about it at the same time, but I know from Whence that opportunity came, and I think I know why, so I am at that perfect peace.  I don't often ask my readers to pray for me, but this time, I think I really need it.  I thought every day would get easier as time went on, but that's not the case with divorce.  You grieve forever, because it's a death of something so precious.  I didn't know that I would never heal from this kind of death of the one-flesh.