Dog and Cat Followers of Christ

      Recently, I have acquired a dog.  I didn't expect this, but GOD knew I needed her.  I have always had cats, but never really had a dog for any length of time,  because I had a husband who hated dogs.  The husband left a few years ago, and GOD brought me a dog, not just for company, but to help me heal and give me some teachable moments. So, now having had both, cats and dogs, I've noticed a parallel between cats and dogs and Christians.    

      Some dogs are easily excitable and not terribly obedient.  They pull on their leashes, trying to pull their masters in the direction they want to go. They will jump all over anyone new, or bark incessantly  with the intent to scare the snot out of people who are unfamiliar to them.  Too many dog owners do not know how to train their dogs or have breeds that are not easily trainable.  

      The Lord saw fit this time that I should have a purebred German Shepherd, which is the most trainable and some would say, the most intelligent of all the species.  This type of dog will cling to one person in the household and become that person's shadow, following wherever their master goes, wanting always to please their master. All day long, she lays at my feet, patiently waiting for me to give her my attention.  Regardless of the time of day or night, when I whisper her name, the ears go up, she rises and waits to hear what is coming next with her tail wagging. 

       Although, she tends to pull a bit on her leash on our walks, when reprimanded, will slow down and walk right by my side, in step with me.  When I do let her run ahead, it's in a controlled environment, and she happily runs, free and beautiful in her stride.  The moment she gets too far ahead of me, though, she stops on her own, looks back to see where I am, and waits for me to catch up with her.  I don't have to tell her to stop, she does it automatically so that I am always in sight and close. 

Beloved, are you starting to see the parallel?  We pull on the leash that GOD has put on us, trying to rush ahead of His plan or drag Him along with the path we want to take.  He pulls back on the choker-collar, but we pull all the more, because we want what we want, and we haven't learned the self-control of just walking by His side.  The harder we pull, the more strangulated we become, and still, we insist on having our own way.

 Sometimes, we jump all over new believers or visitors in our churches or people who show even the slightest interest in learning about Jesus. Many times, we end up clawing them unintentionally, and they back off, deciding it's not for them.  Sometimes, we will bark at non-believers, with the intent to scare the "hell" out of them by being all hellfire and brimstone, letting them know all that they are doing wrong.  Many times we even attack each other and create dog fight after dog fight among the brethren, because we are "different" species. 

When we are properly trained, and that takes time, we learn to walk right by GOD's side, waiting for the go ahead to run up ahead of Him, happily making ground in a beautiful stride.  When we know that we've gone far enough, we will stop, turn back and make sure that GOD is still with us, and we will seek His permission to proceed or just walk by His side again for more instruction.  

       We are loyal to our Master, and when GOD is not moving, or so it seems, we lay quietly at his feet, until He says, "Hey, you want to go somewhere with Me?" Like my wonderful dog, day or night, regardless of the time, if I even whisper her name, she is up and ready to listen to whatever it is that I am going to do, either invite her up onto my bed for some company, or just to pet her where she is.  Those ears are up, waiting to hear from me while she patiently just lays there.       

 

JUBILEE

 Cats, well, they are a different story. They know where the food is, they know who their owner is and they will stay with their owner, but they are going to do their own thing no matter what.  They have this attitude that we are there to serve them.  My cats are extremely stubborn and when they get mad, they will do their business in  the house and not their litter box to let me know they are unhappy, stinking up my whole house and further ruining my twenty year old carpets.  

Three times my Jubilee has run away from me, staying out for weeks at a time with me having no idea where he was.  The last time, he got mad about going to the vet and he freaked and jumped out of my arms, escaping and getting lost in a neighborhood miles from home.  By the miraculous hand of GOD, almost six months later, we found him in a neighborhood very far away with the help of a friend who was delivering Chinese food.  

 I thought he was gone for good, but all that time, GOD knew he would be back, and He had a lesson for me to learn. This time, he was thrilled to be back, having had to weather the climate from December to June all alone outside.  While he was gone, he was trapped, neutered and released back in the neighborhood he was caught.  (It's a local program here to cut down on stray feral cats, without destroying the ones roaming the streets.) 

CopyCat with her first PERFECT 7

 When he did come home, he was a much more docile cat, much more affectionate, and he hasn't run away since. He meows at my door when he wants attention, and is compliant when it comes to the cat box and using the great out doors to do his business. He is still somewhat impatient and stubborn, wanting his own way, but, will cower down if he knows he's in trouble for bullying his grandmother, CopyCat, or even the dog.  Sadly, since writing this, over two years ago, Jubilee's grandmother passed away in July of that year, and Jubilee disappeared again in June 2019.  My heart is broken, but it's just another of the things GOD puts us through, and we can either pull on the leach, or just give it a little slack, while the LORD shows us which way to go. 

Need I say more, beloved child of GOD?  Which kind of lover of Yeshua are we? Are we a non-neutered male cat, or a docile one, somewhat compliant, but still doing our own thing?  Or, are we an excitable dog wanting to run ahead of GOD, or scare the "hell" out of the person passing by on the sidewalk? 

        If we have been walking with GOD for long, and we are truly interested in letting GOD be our Lord, the we will become a purebred, like my precious German Shepherd, trainable, compliant and a pure joy to our Master.  

What would Mom think?

(This is another recycled post from my previous blog right after my mother died. This was how I processed the hurt.)

         To quote a classic line in a classic movie, "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn," anymore. Sorry for the language, if some of you are offended, but there is no other appropriate response. I have arrived home from my two week trip to Hell up north. Yes, I said Hell up north. I had to go home to watch my mother die, then manage through her funeral, my first one, in a receiving line. It was brutal. The absolute worst part of that trip was being there with my siblings and all of her friends, after I did the unthinkable. 

       Confession time! I read Mom's emails that she sent to my siblings and her friends about me. I was only interested in what she said about me, and I got an eye full. WOW! I knew my Mom could be a Jekyle and Hyde, but I never thought more Hyde than Jekyl. Mind you, I love my mom, like most daughters do. I'm going to miss her, like anyone else, and a part of me has died with her. I, however, understood my mom, maybe even better than my five siblings, because I am a chip off the old block. I am exactly like her. We clashed a whole lot while I was growing up, and they were nuclear. 

       Now, that's not uncommon, we all go through spells, some worse than others, but the stories I could tell would curl or uncurl your hair. I won't even dare to go into any details out of respect, just know this, my mom was reacting to six decades of her mom rejecting her. My grandmother was reacting to nine decades of her mom rejecting her. Yeah, we keep it in the family all right. I'm the only one who gets it, and gets another chance to get it right.

   

        Mom never received unconditional love and acceptance, unless she was pregnant, and that new baby loved her and made her feel complete. Life for the toddler above that baby didn't go so well when a new one came, the older ones were virtually invisible to mom. It all went south from there. He said, she said, what does it matter what stories are told from whoever's perspective? Six children were irreparably damaged from their dysfunctional life and marriage.

        When the marriage ended, my mother demanded, within inches of our lives, total devotion and loyalty to her, and we were REQUIRED to hate our father. She made life a living hell for us, because she didn't have Jesus. She taught us to reject people before they get a chance to reject you. Guess who resisted! Every little fit Mom took, I got blamed for, because I wouldn't put up with her nonsense, accusing us of being out to get her on our father's behalf. 

   

    GOD called me to something different! Jesus called me out of that rejection cycle, and gave me a chance to live my mother's history all over again and right the wrongs. Let me tell you, I'm doing my best, but definitely failing most of the time. There is no mistake so big that we can make that GOD can't fix. Phew! What a relief to know that. You know, it took Jacob in Genesis one hundred years to finally get it right? I'm only at fifty-six, so I have some play room, here.

        The last few years have been so rough for me. I pretty much had stopped calling mom, because the conversations were mostly negative. She scoffed at everything I did, every word I said. I think she favored my husband over me. She disapproved, and she always let me know it. Whenever I spoke about my writing or my books, she couldn't believe GOD could call me for anything special. She didn't believe, because she had her own pre-conceived, but erroneous concept of who is GOD. He wasn't the miracle working, personal, and very involved GOD, the loving unconditionally GOD that the Bible tells us. Therefore, if she didn't believe in the miraculous GOD, she surely didn't believe I was anybody special to Him.

       This week, if finally realized that I've been in prison all this time. I've been in "What Would Mom Think Prison." I've been trapped by a spirit of unbelief, knowing anything I told mom about my writing or work for GOD meant absolutely nothing to her, and she did not approve. In fact, I knew in my heart, regardless of what I did, mom would not approve. She even said, "I disapprove" over and over for the five and a half decades that I knew her.

      I never realized until today, just how hard I've been working to accomplish the impossible. I've been trying to get mom to like me, to approve of what I do, to see that I had real worth in the Kingdom of heaven. That was never going to happen. I did not even realize that in the back of my head, while I always contemplated my future, I would always think, "What would Mom think?" Immediately, I could hear her scoffing in my head, knowing full well, that was what I was facing.

       I'm free, now. I never have to think that way again. Now, GOD can do whatever He wants or planned to do with me, and I don't have to worry about Mom 'poking' fun at my delusions of grandeur. I wonder just how many billions of daughters and sons out there are trapped in the dungeon of disapproval, and who will like me, finally be able to breath the fresh air of freedom.

No one is promised tomorrow 
so make sure you logout!

(Addendum: I wrote this last year August 16, 2019, right before my mother's funeral in my previous Blog: The Woman at the Well)

     Tomorrow, I will bury my mother with my five siblings, of which I wrote in an earlier post. It was an unexpected death, not sudden, but surely unexpected. Cancer came in and humbled my mom, because sometimes, that is how GOD has to do it. People say that GOD never sends cancer, well, I happen to disagree. The Bible is clear that GOD sends calamity. 

  Maybe it is not done by His hand specifically, but He is ultimately Sovereign, and nothing comes by us or to us without His prior knowledge and permission.  We read in the first chapter of Job that GOD was bragging on his faithful servant, Job, when the devil approached GOD and accused him of being faithful only because he had everything served to him on a silver platter, to quote a contemporary colloquialism. GOD let Satan stricken Job taking everything away from him, children, livestock, servants, and all his earthly goods. When Job did not curse GOD, the devil had something else up his sleeve, PAIN! It's one thing to lose all our earthly goods, it's a whole new ball game when physical pain and discomfort torture us, wearing us out. Again, Satan had to seek permission from GOD, and it was granted, however the devil was to spare Job's life. (Hence, the devil has power to take life, according to this Scripture. Remember that little point!) The devil has to seek permission for everything he does, so the devil gets the blame, but GOD gets the glory in it, if we let Him. (Romans 8:28) The devil hit Job with everything he had, and yet, Job did not curse GOD.

     Now, Job may not have cursed GOD, but boy oh boy, he surely did complain, and who wouldn't? This is where GOD becomes an even bigger GOD, who can handle all our complaints, and He actually prefers that we do come to Him, and Him alone. Job was not suicidal, but he cursed the day he was born. Things went from bad to worse when Job's "friends" instead of grieving with him, accused him of deserving of this punishment from GOD. There was no mention of the devil in those days, so all things came from GOD's hand, the good, the bad, and the ugly. The mere thought that something so dreadful just happening upon a righteous man, for no reason other than to resolve a bet between GOD and the evil one was simply unheard of, unthinkable, and quite frankly, disturbing beyond human comprehension. My mother's cancer came like that, out of nowhere, unexpected, unannounced, and unheard of, as cancer was not in our family history. I guess we all thought we were safe. Cancer runs in families, right? If no one in your family or line of ancestors had cancer, well, then you were going to dodge that bullet, or so we like to think. 

   How wrong we are. I was the first in my family to contract it, a very very rare form, parotid cancer. Only one in every 500,000 women, my age contract this kind of cancer. It is even rare for older men, let alone a middle-aged woman. This I knew was from GOD, because I sort of got a heads-up on it. I believed that the Holy Spirit warned me two years ahead of time that cancer was coming to humble me and keep me humble. Again, I wrote about this ordeal in an earlier blog. Cancer, Death, and Humble Pie, Among Others . 

   My cancer was stage one, so easily defeated with a little radiation HELL! It was slightly under six months of hell for me, but it did the trick. It drew me closer to GOD. It taught me more of Who He is and His grace being sufficient in my weakness. It had the intended purposed affect on me, and now, I'm a "ticking" time-bomb with all the radiation I did receive, thus perpetually feeding me humble pie for the rest of my days here on this planet. My mom's cancer was quite a bit different. It had an appetite for her body that was ravenous, and it fed on her like a famished lion. In less than twelve weeks, my mom was gone.  This cancer was brutal, tumors grew like wildfire and burned like it also. My mom suffered terribly for about eight weeks. It was a suffering one would never want to watch their parent endure. I learned that it is just as hard to watch one's parent suffer as it is one's child. As would any child, I rushed home from one thousand miles away to be with my mother in her worst hour of suffering, and to be with her and my siblings as she exited this world and entered the next. I don't like to use the word dying, I'd much rather call it graduation or demotion. In my mother's case, I truly think it was a graduation, as I did not know her spiritual status. I did, however, receive what I thought was revelation from GOD that He had her up there in heaven, and all was well, now. The minute after she died, John 3:16 popped up as the first tweet in my Twitter feed. There was one other thing that I believed was from GOD, and that was what I was reading the second she took her last breath. I just so happened to be in 2 Chronicles 33, reading about King Manasseh. 

     Now, that was a bad king, so bad that he caused the final judgment from the Lord, to come upon Judah, the southern kingdom in 586 B.C. Both the northern kingdom and the southern kingdom had turned their back on GOD and worshiped other gods, and that was the least of their sins, from a human perspective. There were far more evil things they did that you can find out with a little investigative work on your own, but be prepared to have your stomach turned upside down. King Manasseh, though, he took the cake, and the frosting, and the candles, when it comes to evil. It is said of him that he lined the streets of Jerusalem with the blood from one end to the other. It is even reported that he had the prophet Isaiah hung on a wooden X and sawed in half from the bottom up. Now, that's a scene I can't even fathom to visualize, nor would I want to. You really can't get much more evil than that.  Both 2 Kings and 2 Chronicles speak of just how evil was the son of the good king, Hezekiah, but only 2 Chronicles tells of Manasseh's repentance. When God wants to humble a person, He knows just what it will take, and a hook in Manasseh's nose and bronze fetters on his feet did the trick. In his affliction, King Manasseh called out to the LORD. Now, we humans would have said, "tough cookies, bud, you deserve this." Aren't we glad that we are not GOD and GOD is not us, that we don't think like GOD and GOD doesn't think like us? One small act of humbling himself before the LORD, a sincere act of repentance (a change of heart), and GOD restored the evil king, who was immediately transposed into a good king. He proved his repentance was genuine as he went about restoring Jerusalem, the Temple, removing the wooden idols, and demanding that the people worship only GOD. It's an amazing story of just how big and wide is the Grace of GOD with one simple, sincere act of humiliation before him.  

      As I mentioned, I was reading these verses just as my mom took her last breath, and that is no coincidence. I truly believe that GOD wanted me to know that all the sharp words my mom used were thrown in the deepest part of the ocean, gone forever, and not held against her. Let me tell you, she had a tongue sharper than than any finely tuned razor blade. She could chop a person to pieces with it with no effort at all on her part, and in no time flat. She wasn't just a Italian Yankee firecracker, she was a nuclear explosion when her fuse was lit. The day after she she died, I happened to stumble upon some of her emails she wrote to my siblings about me and my children. After reading about twenty of them, I had seen more than my eyes should have seen. There is NO question in my mind why my siblings hated me so much.  Mom was the fuel that fed that fire of fury She had said the most dreadfully horrible things about me and my children that no decent relative should say about another, let alone a mother about her own child and grandchildren. I had no idea that who I thought was my supportive mother was not only not so supportive, but she had hoped to see me fail. According to these emails, she hated me and even went as far as to take my ex-husband's side when he abandoned me.  Maybe she even got some pleasure from it. I will never understand this, but here is where that BIG huge Grace of GOD comes into play.  My mom's heart was like every human heart, deceptively evil, hard to even fathom (Jeremiah 17:9), and GOD, knowing that her time was coming soon.  Instead of letting her evil heart drag her into hell, he gave her an opportunity to be so afflicted that her only option and hope would be to call out to GOD, as did King Manasseh. The Bible says in several places, "Whoever calls on the name of the LORD will be saved," and I heard many times during that brief time of severe suffering, her calling on the name of Jesus for relief and mercy.  

    I could hold a grudge against my mother, but what purpose would that serve? My tongue is just as sharp as hers, and I've ripped a few people apart in my day, even in recent days, when my fuse was lit. It's a terrible sin, but it's the human condition. We let our emotions dictate our words and actions when under a great deal of stress or distress. I am no angel and in need of just as much mercy from GOD as was my mom. My mom didn't get a chance to apologize to me, but GOD let me see just how He works in forcing an apology, even a silent one out of one's heart on their deathbed. I, on the other hand have plenty of opportunities to apologize, still, and I plan to make that a common habit, hoping for a little understanding a great deal of mercy from those I've offended. I could hate that woman for the damage she had done to me all my growing up years, and there is still plenty of damage left over, but she is not that woman anymore. She is a new creation, a whole person, loving, happy and pleasant in Glory.  I never saw my mother pleasant and happy.  I can't wait to meet the woman she is now, and I will have the chance, sooner rather than later. Sin is sin, whether we fall into it, or commit it with malice-a-forethought, and we are in need of forgiveness from GOD for every sin, past, present and future.  Here is where GOD looks at the righteousness of Jesus and his work on the cross, and not the decades worth of sin that we either fall into, or plot in vain. Grace is not a license to sin, but in the end, if we do take that license to sin, in the end, GOD knows our true hearts, even if we hide it from the world.  Maybe I'm wrong, but I see this suffering as a gift from GOD. He will use it to bring us closer to Him either in this life or the next.   I would like to believe that He took pity on me and my mom and taught us BOTH a very valuable lesson in how GOD not only humbles us in our sin, but by doing that, He wipes away 87 years of evil behavior in one instant, and that proves to us just how BIG and WIDE is His grace and mercy.

Don’t feed the elephant in the pond.

There’s an expression about an elephant in the room and most people understand its meaning.  The elephant is that thing that is constantly on everyone’s mind, but no one wants to mention it. Well, I had an elephant in the pond. There’s an elephant in the room of my life and I can’t seem to get around it. It keeps rushing me. Jesus is bigger than the elephant, and He will use whatever means He needs to use to send me a message above and around the elephant. The elephant is still there, but I can hear Jesus voice of reassurance when I stop looking at the elephant, but just listen for GOD’s voice.

Nightmares,. I’m plagued with them. If I go to sleep and silence befalls the room, guaranteed, I will have a nightmare. It happens all the time. This is why I put my sermon playlist on when I’m going to sleep, if Jesus is being preached or Christian music is playing, I am under GOD’s protection and the enemy cannot torment me in my sleep.  Sometimes, however, the nightmares are from GOD. Well, I had an elephant in a pond.

I had one the other day and I woke up with my heart racing.  You know those dreams when you’re screaming but no sound is coming out, but you are screaming with every bit of emotional energy you have.  I dreamt that I went somewhere with my ex and a few of my other children, but I left one of my children home, she’s twelve. I didn’t mean to be gone all day, but it turned out that way.  I felt guilty and when we pulled up in the street (of our old home, by the way)  a bad feeling came over me.  Melanie’s friend was standing on the sidewalk with a look of terror on her face.  She was shaking and terrified.  I asked her,

“Where’s Melanie!  Her voice kept breaking as she tried to tell me what happened. I kept yelling at her, “Where’s Melanie!” 

Then in tears she said. “She went in the water she was just  exploring. She went in the water.”  She looked up into my eyes and I knew what was coming next. “She didn’t come up.”

I froze, I thought, “Oh GOD! This can’t be happening to me.”  I started running toward the pond with a trail of people behind me, screaming for help, telling someone to call 911. 

I reached this tiny pond, no bigger than my front yard. I knew it was deep, and I couldn’t decide whether or not to jump in and search for her. I was so afraid of finding her dead body. I was terrified. If I jumped in and saw her dead then there’d be no hope, it would be over. As I debated, I saw some sand rising to the top as if it were bubbles.  I thought, “Maybe she’s alive, deep down there and digging her way out…," I froze and I screamed, but I couldn’t decide what to do. I kept seeing the dirt rising, and that gave me hope.  I continued to scream in anguish, then I awoke.

It took me a couple of minutes to get my bearings. Of course, I immediately turned on a sermon and started listening.  A day later, that dream came back to me. My dreams usually do not unless there’s a message from GOD in it.  This one came back and I heard, “Pay attention, Kristina, think.”   I saw the dirt rise to the water’s surface. Then I thought, “maybe she was digging under the pond to get to the other side where there was no water. She must have gotten resourceful and found a pocket of air under the bottom of the pond and she’s digging. “  Then I heard.  “As long as there’s dirt coming up to the surface there’s hope.”  The pieces of the dream kept coming back to me and I understood the correlations.

The murky pond represented my heart drowning in sea of despair, but the pond was so small. In other words, smaller in reality than I am making it.  I was on my old street of the house we lived in eighteen years ago.  Melanie wasn’t even born then.  I knew right away what GOD was trying to show me. “That’s your old life.”

“Do not remember the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I will do a new thing, now it shall spring forth; shall you not know it? I will even make a road in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.” Isaiah 43:18-19

I asked GOD, “Of all eight children, why Melanie,”  I took a stab in the dark. I looked up and said to GOD,  “She’s the only one.”  That matter is too personal for a public blog. To put it simple, she’s the only one who touched the elephant.  I truly believe that GOD did indeed send that nightmare. God will use any means He has to either get our attention either to convict us, to strengthen us, or to encourage us and tell us, again for the 16,733 time, “Don’t worry, child. You can keep hoping, there’s hope.”

“And it shall come to pass afterward that I will pour out My Spirit on all flesh; Your sons and daughters will prophesy. Your old men will dream dreams, your young men will see visions. And also on My menservants and on My maid servants, I will pour My Spirit in those days. Joel 2:28-29

I guess it’s time to face facts, I’m the “old” category, but there’s hope. In all of this, there has been one promise that GOD gave me at the very beginning of this arduous journey and that was in Joel.

“I will repay the years the locusts have eaten.” 

Let me tell you, I have some pretty fat locusts in my yard, house, and everywhere I look.  So, as long as the dirt is rising to the top of the dark murky pond of despair, there’s hope!

By George, I do believe that there really is a "Somewhere Over the Rainbow"

       One of my favorite times of the day, or rather, night, is about 2:30 am - 3:30 am, and my favorite place is to be out on my back deck, wrapped in an old comforter, under a sky full of stars, while swinging on one of my two deck swings. I stare up into the night sky and have some of my best talks with GOD. Today, He taught me a great truth and a wonderful explanation for these past few horrendous years.

      These last few years the heat in the fiery furnace of affliction has been exceptionally high, so much so that I have 3rd degree burns over 95% of my spirit and soul. Each year has been getting progressively worse than the previous. I've cried an ocean worth of tears and I think maybe Jesus has, also, watching me hurt so much, but tonight, I think I may have seen a great truth.

       You see, I've lived in "Kansas" all my life, gray, boring, but stable Kansas life. It's all I've known, it's all I've ever expected. I never sought more, because I never knew there was a “Somewhere over the Rainbow,” out there for me. God wanted me to know that there really is a "Somewhere over the rainbow, way up high, where skies are blue, and troubles melt like lemon drops, and dreams that you dare to dream of really do come true."

   In order to prove to me that it really exists, He brought me there temporarily in my life, mind, heart and dreams. I had heard of that place, believed it existed for some, but never dared to dream that I'd ever leave the gray-scale of "Kansas." I never believed that GOD would color my world with the brilliant spectrum of the spectacular hues of the rainbow.

    At first, I couldn't understand why GOD had shown me such a wonderful place, but then took me away out of it, back to an even darker gray-scale Kansas. Since then, He has kept me trapped here, lost like a needle in a Kansas haystack, not able to find my way out, which has just broken my heart even more until tonight. Then, the light got a little brighter when He opened my eyes to a truth I knew about myself, but always hated.

      I'm so terribly sentimental, probably more than the average woman, and when I love something or someone so deeply, I am unable to stop. I take loss harder than most, and it weighs on my heart like 50-ton weight, trying its best to crush it and bleed it dry. GOD had planned all along to take me out of "Kansas," because He knew I would never leave on my own. Being Who GOD is, as Omniscient, He knew I couldn't take the emotional pain of being ripped from what I've always known and loved, unless, I had a taste of "Somewhere over the rainbow" first.

      I've been watching and choking as my "Kansas" has become a dust bowl. Soon, I will be leaving it for good and the knowledge of that fact has ripped a whole in my heart the size of the black hole way out in the universe. Knowing, however, that a place where skies are blue is just beyond the rainbow of promise, has been my saving grace, helping me to accept the current dust bowl status of my "Kansas" life.

      Sometimes, GOD has to turn up the heat in the fiery furnace of affliction to get us ready to handle "Somewhere over the rainbow," because it's going to take more than just a "Kansas" kinda of girl to be able to handle that place in life and still be able to give GOD all the credit and glory, while enjoying the lemon drops and wishing upon a night sky's worth of stars in that new exciting place. 

Maybe, I won't miss "Kansas" after all.

My Favorite version!  Enjoy!  Somewhere Over The Rainbow 

God does not fix what's wrong with 

His people, He starts all over again.

        Jesus did not have a mortgage, and he did not incorporate. He did not have office hours, nor did he assign his Apostles as CEO's, telling them to register with the emperor, and be ready to have all their financial records ready to be audited annually. Jesus never asked for money, he healed for FREE. He never pressured his followers to give toward the mortgage fund or a building project so he could expand his ministry. He did not hire a marketing firm to teach his disciples how to be good stewards. He did not initiate a fund raising campaign to increase the size of the campus, so the corporation could expand, and create more programs, branches, and differing kinds of ministries. Jesus did not rely on programs. Jesus did not seek converts, he taught disciples. He certainly did not have super-conferences with guest speakers and a ticket price upwards of near 100 talents.  He even kept the mysteries of the Kingdom of Heaven a secret from those he knew were in it for only how it filled their bellies.  In Matthew and Luke he said, 

     "To you it has been granted to know the mysteries of the kingdom of heaven, but to them it has not been granted. For whoever has, to him more will shall be given, and he will have an abundance; but whoever does not have, even what he has shall be taken away from him. Therefore, I speak to them in parables; because while seeing they do not see, and while hearing they do not hear, nor do they understand."

       He then went on to quote the prophet Isaiah, because Jesus knew intimately what was written in the Old Testament. He not only knew it, he understood it because he inspired it. I once heard an associate pastor at the church I attended say, "The Old Testament is so hard to understand, it's a difficult read and so harsh. Besides, that’s the Law, we are under grace now, so none of it really applies." When I picked my jaw back up off the floor, I gathered my flock, went home and never went back, to any church. His answer was not out of the ordinary, it's what I hear all the time. He is a New Testament Christian, or what I call a carport as opposed to a garage with a brick siding, a foundation and a solid roof, one that does not blow off with a strong wind.

       I’m not any kind of expert in the Old Testament, but I’ve studied it for eight years now, inside, outside and upside down. (A little Dr. Seuss humor there) You know what my friend, in my humble opinion, I actually find MORE grace and mercy in the Old Testament than the New. The Law and the animal sacrifices did NOT save the Israelite's, nor did it cleanse them of sin, it was the grace behind the obedience of the practice of the Law. The sacrifice was supposed to be a reminder of the curse and damage that sin does, and how much GOD hates sin. It was a reminder of Whom they served and Who saved them, as opposed to other pagan religions.

       New Testament Christians say, "We are the church, the bride of Christ, GOD will never abandon us" just like the Jews said, "This is the temple of the LORD, this is the Temple of the LORD, and they thought GOD would never leave it. SURPISE, He did.

       If someone tells you that he/she is a New Testament Christian, well, then you know that you are talking only to a carport with no walls, no foundation, and an aluminum roof that can easily be blown away.  Do not bother to argue with them, because they have their minds made up, and everyone else is wrong. Their pastor told them to be that way, to stand their ground under their carports. We can try to educate them, but most have unteachable hearts from anyone but their CEO/pastor. They are loyal to their corporations, that's for sure. After all, they have invested much of their funds into this capital venture.

     

      The more we understand the history of GOD's people, the more we can see GOD repeating Himself, over and over, again. The book of Ecclesiastes, lately, has become one of my favorites, because basically it says, “Don’t expect GOD to do anything He has never done before, because there is nothing new under the sun that GOD hasn’t already done.” Yes, you will have to get your Bible out and find that passage, also. The purpose in doing that may just help you find some wisdom GOD wants you to have before and after those verses. GOD's people throughout all generations kept becoming too corrupt to reform or repair.  Over and over again GOD pulled out a remnant and started all over again. 

     As the metaphor Mama that I am, if you need a picture, I have a good one for you. The church today is like flour. There is all-purpose, there is self-rising, and then there is this “whole-wheat,” that’s really not whole or in it’s original form. No, my friends, the Remnant is the whole grain, straight from the ground, exactly how GOD made it, in it’s original form. It’s not bleached, it’s not ground into fine powder that just becomes dust, rather in it's natural state, it has all the nutrients needed to feed the flock. 

      Where does wheat grow? Does it grow in a building, on a huge cement campus, in programs, does money grow it? It grows where the gospel was meant to go, in the fields, outside where the Wind can take it where the Wind intends for it to go. The pure Gospel is the protein in the whole grain, it’s the muscle that makes the Remnant strong. It’s not supposed to be holed up in four walls and a ceiling, keeping it contained. Jesus said "Go and make disciples," not "gather and convert people." Beloveds,  GOD made sure that the Temple was completely destroyed in AD 70, because the Temple was now the Holy Spirit living in us, and the Temple is meant to have arms, legs, and wheels, and it is supposed to be moving at all times.

    Satan entered the church in the very first century to begin the corruption.  Paul and Peter and Jude all mention false teachers and prophets. The doctrine of Balaam is alive and well and has been since the days in the wilderness.  Corrupt within, because an outside attack is not effective enough.  Christianity today is an offshoot of the corrupt religion invented by  Constantine.  He created his own brand of Christianity, one with the political advantage he needed.  He was just another false convert, using thw work of Yeshua for self-advancement.   He wiped clean any signs or practices of Judaism that GOD Himself ordered and commanded and outlawed all the appointed feasts and the seventh day Sabbath.  Imagine an emperor so bold as to take what GOD instituted and outlaw it in the name of Christ.  Constantine incorporated pagan practices, slapping a Christian name on them, and the corrupt papacy only added to this man-made deliniation of the Word of GOD. 

    I'm sorry to say, but evangelism has been the downfall of the church.  Satan always takes a little bit of truth and slides in his brand of lies to convince man that he is doing the right thing  Today, the church's recipe for salvation is NOT Biblically sound.  Just saying a prayer saves no one.  The only one who can initiate salvation is GOD Himself.  He decides who becomes His true children.  

John 1:

13 who were born, not of blood, nor of the will of the flesh, nor of the will of man, but of God.

John 6:

“Do not murmur among yourselves. 44 No one can come to Me unless the Father who sent Me draws him; and I will raise him up at the last day. 45 It is written in the prophets, ‘And they shall all be taught by God.’ Therefore everyone who has heard and learned from the Father comes to Me.

63 It is the Spirit who gives life; the flesh profits nothing. The words that I speak to you are spirit, and they are life. 64 But there are some of you who do not believe.” For Jesus knew from the beginning who they were who did not believe, and who would betray Him. 65 And He said, “Therefore I have said to you that no one can come to Me unless it has been granted to him by My Father.”

 

Matthew 16:

16 Simon Peter answered and said, “You are the Christ, the Son of the living God.”

17 Jesus answered and said to him, “Blessed are you, Simon Bar-Jonah, for flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, but My Father who is in heaven.

Romans 9:

11(for the children not yet being born, nor having done any good or evil, that the purpose of God according to election might stand, not of works but of Him who calls),

14 What shall we say then? Is there unrighteousness with God? Certainly not! 15 For He says to Moses, “I will have mercy on whomever I will have mercy, and I will have compassion on whomever I will have compassion.” 16 So then it is not of him who wills, nor of him who runs, but of God who shows mercy. 17 For the Scripture says to the Pharaoh, “For this very purpose I have raised you up, that I may show My power in you, and that My name may be declared in all the earth.” 18 Therefore He has mercy on whom He wills, and whom He wills He hardens.

       My friends, we do not ask Jesus into our hearts.  In order for it to be a true conversion, the Holy Spirit enters our hearts before we know what's happening to us. Grace enters us in the form of conviction of our sinful state long before we invite Yeshua into our hearts.