I WILL NOT PUT A DRESS A VEIL AND A BOW-TIE ON DIVORCE 

 As a child who grew up with divorce and the ugliness of all that is entailed, and all the damage that is done by it, I surely am NOT going to gloss over it and try to make it look attractive for my children.  My husband and I married 35 years ago, vowing never to divorce.  We had a rededication of our vows on our fifth anniversary, and with eight baby dedications, we again vowed to remain a loving nurturing husband, wife, father and mother so our children could be raised in a s secure environment where they knew they were loved.  Now, my husband wants me to gloss over his decision to divorce, well I say, HELL NO!  I will not put a dress on his actions and just write off everything we vowed, and tried to build, so he can destroy it, and walk away free and clear.  I’m sorry, but I’m NOT a liar.  I will NEVER lie to my children, ever.  I grew up with all liars, I will NOT repeat history, even if their father wants history repeated. 

  I'm not one to lie, and for me to say to my children, "Well, daddy just decided to love someone else besides the woman to whom he married and vowed TEN times to be faithful to," but we must respect his decision and you need to honor your father.  I refuse to participate in what GOD say He hates.  I will not go to court, to fight this out before a human judge.  People advise me to get a lawyer and fight him, and fight for them.   Sorry, that ain't happening. My children need to learn just how ugly and painful this is, and get a full appreciation for the trail of devastation divorce  leaves behind.

It is NOT my responsibility to gloss over the ugliness of what their father is doing, nor is it my responsibility to go to court to plead with a human judge to make my children's father do what he should be already doing. I'm not going to go fight tooth and nail, compromise my convictions and self-respect to BEG for dollars and cents. If He chooses to cut us off or down to nothing, that's on him, not me. It isn’t my responsibility to save face for him.  I’m against this, I’ve tried my hardest to try and talk him out of this, but he is going through with it.  It’s been six years since he told me while I had cancer that he was going to file for divorce, and as soon as he got a huge windfall inheritance, that is exactly what he did to protect his assets from me and the children.  This is all about money.  I will not allow his name, honor and reputation to be salvaged in this abomination. He has chosen to destroy this family, and if he has chosen to cut them down to next to nothing and they lose out, he will shoulder the blame, not me.  I want my children to hurt, not out of spite, but growing pains are just that.  I want them to never do this to their own children.  I want them to hate divorce as much as GOD and I do.  To make matters even worse, he is divorcing me over Skype, after 35 years, on the 36th anniversary of the say he asked me to marry him.  If that isn't GOD adding insult to injury, I don't know what is.  GOD is Sovereign over every detail of our lives, and the irony of the first hearing being on the day my husband asked me to marry him is proof that what he is doing is an abomination to GOD and to his family. 

 NO-Fault Divorce, Legal in Civil Law, Illegal in GOD's LAW

 

     I have been silent during this attack on myself and my children, hoping that my husband would come to his senses and not go through with this divorce.  We both grew up in MISERABLY, horribly abusive homes from fathers who declared war on our mothers.  Both our mothers were profoundly affected by our father's actions.  Both fathers abandoned us.  When we married, we were not Christians.  Five years later, we had another ceremony and entered into a covenant marriage.  I signed those papers, and because I signed those papers, swearing to GOD that I would NEVER sign divorce papers, I must keep my word to GOD.  

     My husband and I had eight children together, each baby was dedicated in church where we vowed to raise them in a loving, nurturing Christian home with BOTH mother and father taking equal part in their upbringing.  Henceforth, that is ten times we both vowed to the LORD not to ever divorce.  Now, I am keeping those ten vows, and whatever happens, happens.  My husband is declaring war on me, on his children and on GOD by going through with this.  When I first got the papers, I was absolutely devastated.  I did not even open them.  I laid them on the altar, and prayed over them, asking GOD what to do. He said to stay the course.  Then I gave them back to my husband and told him this was his war against GOD.  I did not want to deal with it.  Then, the second time papers came, I reacted the same way, and I did the same.  Again, I got the same answer from GOD, and again, I did not open them.  I knew if I did that I would hate my husband, and I never wanted to hate the father of my children, the man I swore my undying love to twice.    Yesterday, when I got these papers, I'll admit that I freaked out.  I never thought it would go this far.   I am absolutely devastated and will remain so for the rest of my life. 

     I will not  participate in this war on the family we both vowed to protect.  He is destroying his family and over Skype which is a double offense.  Imagine, divorcing  your wife of  thirty-five years over Skype.  How low can one go?   Really, the offense is far beyond what words can even describe.  

       I used to love and admire my husband greatly.  I do not love my husband anymore, no wife could.  I don't want to live with him, either.  I am will to do whatever it is that GOD wills, even if that meant remaining only legally wed for the rest of my life.  My husband has admitted that he is not doing GOD's will.  Man may declare this marriage dissolved, but according to GOD's Word in Matthew, Mark, Luke, Romans, and 1 Corinthians, it remains full and intact in the eyes of GOD.  He said, let no man put asunder.  Marriage is over only after death.  GOD let it be known to me that if He allows my husband this divorce, then he indeed was  declaring war on me, on his children, on his family and on Jesus Christ.    

   No-fault divorce is a treacherous act, a heinous act, it's the murdering of the one-flesh.   It is similar to the act of abortion, selling baby parts for profit is no different then ripping families apart for profit in a no-fault divorce. He says in His Word that He hates divorce, Malachi 2:16.